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11.11.20

11.11.20

It's Wednesday. There are 55 days until the Georgia Senate run-offs and 69 days until the inauguration. Biden calls Trump's refusal to concede an "embarrassment" as Trump continues to deny reality, Obamacare might survive the right-wing trash on SCOTUS and we're entering a bad COVID spot.

Note: Well hello and happy hump day, you gorgeous freedom fighters. Still freaking out a little? Yeah, us too. And we're pretty fucking tired of being told to calm down by political reporters who spent the last five years getting played by a dim-witted game show host. But yesterday, we took a break from being terrified and optimistic to instead be shocked. Now y'all hold onto your hats because you're not gonna believe this shit. It turns out that Melanie Trump, the Slovenian goat milker who married Trump, has also refused to acknowledge the Biden win or get in contact with Dr. Jill Biden. Now knowing Melanie, it's entirely possible she thinks she's only supposed to call a doctor after her husband has given her another STD. But this just seems so out of character for that racist birther idiot who wore that "I Don't Care Do U?" jacket when going to see kids in cages. How can someone who hates Christmas be so classless? We're just shocked. Here we've spent the last four years thinking she was racist fucking trash, and here to find out she was racist super fucking trash this whole time. Melanie, on behalf of a country that hates you, don't let the door hit you in your lying scummy ass on the way out. Or do. We don't really care. Do u? More: Daily Mirror, CNN

Note two: Are we alone in having a special hatred for that human garbage? No? Ok cool. Fuck you, Melanie.

Note three: On the other hand, have we ever mentioned how much we love Angela Merkel? More: Vogue

Note four: And Jemele Hill. More: The Atlantic

Note five: In Florida, Ron DeSantis wants to legalize murder if it's committed by right-wing nutjobs. More: Miami Herald

Note six: You know something exciting that we haven't talked about? California is getting a new senator because Amazing Kamala is gonna be Vice President of the United States. More: Washington Post

Note seven: Did you see that dirtbag Pompeo yesterday laughing about how there will be a second Trump term? Yeah, he really sucks at defending and promoting democracy. But you know what he's good at? Being just another two-bit arms dealer. More: Reuters

Note eight: The governor of South Dakota belongs in jail. For lots of reasons. More: NBC News

Note nine: We've always heard they do things bigger down in Texas. That is apparently true of COVID. More: CNN

Note 10: Here's the nightmare scenario that's keeping us from sleeping. More: Axios

Note 11: Just a quick programming note — we're going to take tomorrow and Friday off, so we won't see you again until Monday. We're sorry to leave you hanging like this, but we've gotta take a few days off to recharge. It's how we stay sexy. We do want to leave you with this thought — no matter what he says or what kind of shit he pulls, Donald Trump is a fucking loser. Just remember that if you're starting to feel anxious like we are. Oh and remember that TBS loves you. Have a fantastic end of your week and weekend, and we'll see you back here on Monday. Happy Veterans Day, and thank you to anyone reading this who served. And thank you to the veterans who served but aren't reading this. 

Note 12: Here's Beyonce and Eddie Vedder singing Bob Marley's Freedom Song. More: YouTube

'An embarrassment'

That's what President-Elect Joe Biden called Trump's refusal to concede the race and acknowledge Biden's win. And he's right. Biden is getting congratulated by world leaders while Republican senators lie to try and keep Trump happy so he'll help them in the Georgia Senate run-offs. It is scary, and it is dangerous. Even fucking Erdogan congratulated Biden. So Mitch and crew hate our democracy more than the Turkish dictator? Meanwhile, Trump is installing deranged loyalists at the Pentagon, and his star witness in Pennsylvania recanted. We're sincerely hoping that dude will rot in prison. Here's how we feel about all of this. It's not "performance art" as the chicken-shit kiss-asses over at Politico are saying. But it's also damn hard to argue with the math. We trust Joe, and he's very reassuring. But we don't trust Trump, and we think he's capable of anything except being good at his job or spelling hamburger. So hang in there. And if you need to be reassured some more, the NYT actually did some good journalism, contacting election officials in all 50 states and finding no evidence of widespread fraud. More: Washington Post, Washington Post II, Washington Post III, Washington Post IVCNN, CNN IIYahoo News, Politico, Wall Street Journal, Axios, New York Times

Is SCOTUS fucking with us?

Yesterday, Obamacare went back in front of the Supreme Court again. And while it's a lot like this election in that we won't exhale until it's official, both Roberts and Kavanaugh seemed skeptical of the case. And they should be. It's a fucking joke of a case that never should've made it to the Supreme Court. But both men seemed willing to accept that the individual mandate can be severed from the rest of the law and the law still survives. Like we said, we won't believe it until it's official, but yesterday appeared to be the cause for some relief. More: Bloomberg

Sick

COVID is raging across the United States, and the president of the United States has quit trying so he can focus on destroying our democracy and golf. We already told you about Texas, but yesterday the U.S. hit an all-time high for hospitalizations across the country. It only took us 10 days in November to get to another 1 million cases. Y'all, this is really bad. Please be safe. Piss off a Trumper, and wear a mask. As one Biden task force member said, "we are about to enter COVID hell." Please pack accordingly. More: New York Times, CNN, Huff Post, Associated Press

Today's clips

The U.S. presidential election was not tainted by widespread voter fraud or irregularities in how ballots were counted, despite a huge effort by President Donald Trump to prove otherwise.
More: Associated Press

The Trump administration's unwillingness to acknowledge that former Vice President Joe Biden won the election has led to an unusual restriction on the flow of national security information to the president-elect.
More: NBC News

We're told the president and his top allies pressured the two Republican senators to take this step, lest he tweet a negative word about them and risk divorcing them from his base ahead of the consequential runoff.
More: AJC

The Biden transition team is officially reaching out to Democratic lawmakers, telling them that President-elect Biden is eager "to seize this transition period to get started."
More: Axios

Senator Elizabeth Warren on Monday blasted the inspector general tasked with monitoring a $2.2 trillion coronavirus relief package for failing to fulfill his mandate, after a spat over investigating the role of lobbyists in the allocation of funds.
More: Bloomberg

Current and former Justice Department officials said Tuesday they were stunned and frustrated by Attorney General William P. Barr's move to loosen internal restrictions on how and when federal prosecutors investigate certain election-fraud cases before the results are certified — and worried that Barr was aiding President Trump's effort to cast doubt on his defeat.
More: Washington Post

As President Donald Trump's campaign continues its wild attempts to overturn President-elect Joe Biden's victory through a series of tenuous lawsuits, it was confronted on a call with the media on Tuesday with reports that one of its witnesses who had alleged ballot tampering had recanted his story.

What followed was several seconds of silence.
More: Buzzfeed News

 






 

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