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10.13.20

10.13.20

It's Tuesday. There are 21 days (THREE WEEKS!!!) until the presidential election. Trump vs. Fauci escalates as COVID thrives, Amy Coney Barrett is already freaking us out and what we can learn about those long John Roberts lines at polling places.

Note: Hey everybody? Feeling sexy today? Yeah, us too. Despite the horrors of the ongoing SCOTUS hearings, we're in a much better mood than the lunatic cussers who put this thing together yesterday. Don't get us wrong. Everything is still a goddamn nightmare from which we can't seem to awake. But to quote Rod in Hot Rod, "life is pain; we've gotta scrape the joy from it every chance we get." And one way to scrape joy is to quote really silly and fantastic Andy Samberg movies. Another is to watch Lt. Col. Amy McGrath wipe the fucking floor with Mitch McConnell's smug scumbag wrinkled ass. The terrible turtle did not appear to prepare for his debate with McGrath and she worked him over good. When she nailed him on taking money from pharmaceutical companies, he asked to change the topic. When she nailed him on the lack of COVID relief, he just laughed like an antique maniac. And when she beat him until he couldn't take it anymore, he said her campaign is "She's a Marine, she's a mom and I've been there too long." We haven't laughed this hard at Mitch since we saw that video of him falling down the stairs (Don't @ us over this shit. You want people who kiss his ass, then go to Politico.). This is an uphill battle. Kentucky is, after all, the same place that elected Rand Paul but put his heroic neighbor in jail. Still, we've waited a long time for someone to go toe-to-toe with McConnell and call him out for his evil bullshit. Last night someone did that. Thank you, Lt. Col. McGrath! More: Huff Post

Note two: Did y'all see Trump in Florida saying he's totally immune and that he was going to kiss everyone in the audience? While it was grotesque for its "grab them by the pussy" vibes, we were pretty fucking disappointed he didn't actually do it. We were promised a super spreader event for hateful Florida trash, and a massive group make-out session with the orange assface would've guaranteed that. More: Washington Post

Note three: Dianne Feinstein. Boy, we don't know. Seriously. Why the fuck are our people even there? To compliment this monster on her family?! Well thank goodness for that. 

Note four: This just breaks our heart to see. Giselle Fetterman, the wife of Pennsylvania Lt. Gov. John Fetterman, was accosted by racist trash. We're sending love to the Fettermans because we think they're amazing and because America is supposed to be better than this shit. More: People

Note five: These anti-choice assholes always find a loophole, don't they? More: Business Insider

Note six: Eric Trump has cool friends. Wait a minute! Eric Trump doesn't do anything cool. Wait another minute! Eric Trump doesn't have any friends. WDIV Local 4

Note seven: If we hadn't already voted, this would've done it for us. Because we basically do whatever Snoop says to do. Seems like just yesterday that we were standing in line to buy Doggystyle. Y'all don't even want to know how much Corona we've bought since he started doing those ads. More: Charlotte Observer

Note eight: We don't normally do birthdays because that's what those beltway kissasses and small animal murderers at Politico Playbook do, but we're gonna make an exception for Doug Emhoff, who could be our first second gentleman. We don't know him well, but if Kamala likes him, that's more than enough for us. So happy birthday, Doug. Playbook has your present.

Note nine: Our good mood is rapidly fading, so we're gonna knock off the notes section a little early. Oh and to our dear TBS reader who emailed yesterday, Trump is a diseased butt cheek that even a starving cannibal wouldn't touch. We are three weeks out, folks. We're fired up, ready to go, mad as hell and ready to fuck up some Republicans at the ballot box. We know that's not how President Obama used to put it, but we gave it a Trumpland twist. We love y'all. We hope you are taking care of yourself, fighting like hell and not drinking your breakfast more than three days a week. Have a fantastic day. Love y'all! 

Note 10: An update. After getting his ancient taint handed to him by Amy McGrath last night, Mitch announced this morning that the Senate will focus on COVID relief when the Senate returns on Oct. 19. So Amy McGrath already got a win for Democrats.

LEAVE FAUCI ALONE

After the Trump campaign used Dr. Fauci's words without context or permission in one of their ads, Fauci said it's like the campaign is harassing him. He called it "really unfortunate and disappointing," but said he would not quit while he is still fighting a deadly virus. He also warned that the ad might backfire, and we tend to agree. Mostly because President Dumbfuck McCovid was attacking him on twitter this morning like the deranged asshole that he is. Gosh, whose side do we think America will take here? The doctor who is trying to help or the gameshow host who appears to work for the virus? And this is happening while the virus is again surging in 17 states and a new study says that there are 75,000 more COVID deaths than we've been told. Keep firing, assholes. The Daily Beast, WSB Radio, USA Today

Amy Coney Bullshit

So the day is still getting started and already Amy Coney Barrett is showing decent Americans why she's going to be a disaster as a Supreme Court justice. First of all, lady, it ain't sexual preference. It's not a choice people make. It's who they are. And if you don't fucking get that, then you shouldn't be within a goddamn country mile of a federal bench in this country. Second of all, the Constitution is pretty fucking clear about who sets the elections in this country. If you need to get together with clerks and look it up, then you're a fucking hack. The good news is that Democrats clearly got under the GOP's skin yesterday with their endless focus on healthcare. Added bonus: Watching Lindsey continue to cry about Jamie Harrison's fundraising is one our new favorite things. More: CNN

James Crow

Since the Republican Party is going for voter suppression but pretending like they're not, we figured he wouldn't want to go by Jim anymore. Yesterday we saw long lines of voters in Georgia. One woman stood there for 11 fucking hours to vote. We're being told this is a really good thing because it demonstrates enthusiasm. Ok, we're happy our voters are enthusiastic. Now let's go back to what the fuck why the fuck did it take 11 fucking hours to vote in America what fucking country is this?!!!!!!! Thanks. We needed to get that out of our systems. Make a plan. Do not let these motherfuckers stop you from voting. More: Washington Post

Today's clips

A U.S. federal appeals court panel on Monday upheld Texas Gov. Greg Abbott's order to shut down dozens of mail ballot drop-off sites weeks before November's election.
More: NBC News

Sen. John Kennedy (R-La.) was served a dose of reality Monday on Twitter after he claimed that "racist" is "one of the worst things you can call an American."
More: Huff Post

Eric Trump took his Secret Service agents to Trump golf courses in Scotland, as he led transatlantic tours for paying customers. Donald Trump Jr. took his protectors to the Trump hotel in Vancouver, stopping over on hunting trips to Canada.
More: Washington Post

In recent weeks, Fox News' Brain Room—the channel's longtime research resource for its dwindling population of fact-based journalists, which suffered disproportionately in the latest round of layoffs—launched a behind-the-scenes operation that current and former staffers say is designed to reinforce and amplify Trump's erroneous accusations.
More: Washington Post

A voter initiative led by Michelle Obama is partnering with a similar group founded by NBA star LeBron James and other prominent Black athletes and entertainers to sponsor events in major U.S. cities starting next week to generate excitement about voting early for the Nov. 3 election.
More: Politico

 





















 

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