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Today's Big Stuff


It's Thursday. There are 103 days until the presidential election. The Portland mayor gets teargassed and Trump questions the genders of protesting moms, some more horrifying COVID news and more lies about sending our kids back to school.

Note: Well, folks, we have some bad news. We went ahead and took that cognitive test Trump keeps bragging about, and it didn't go well. We were doing great with person, woman and man, but when we got to camera and tv, we just totally choked. It's been a rough morning here. That kind of thing is hard to take. Our self esteem is in the dumps. We feel like we have to start dressing differently. More overalls, dunce caps and plastic underwear. LOL. We kid of course. Can you believe this is what the American presidency has come to? A bloated braindead tangerine bragging that he remembered five words. And that wasn't even the most upsetting part of the interview. Did you hear him talking about how Dr. Birx wears a scarf? Or the stupid shit about how testing is overrated? What we wouldn't give for Toby Keith to write a song about that shit. Yay America! More: Washington Post

Note two: Y'all know we like to be team players, so we're not asking this question with a lot of joy -- What are the Democrats we elected doing about the president's invasion of American cities? Press releases? Tweets? If you're frustrated, you are not alone. We love and trust the speaker, but lately it seems like our go-to move is to unilaterally disarm and hope the next election fixes everything. If we're not gonna fight now, when will we?

Note three: We screwed up, and we deserve to have our lunch taken from us. We failed to congratulate Joy Reid for her stellar numbers her first night out of the gate. Congrats, Joy! We are terrible people, and we understand if you now hate us. Hell, we kinda understood if you hated us yesterday too. Especially since some pro-Trump trolls have been signing up to help them achieve rage boners.

Note four: As we were writing this morning, AOC was on the House floor telling Ted Yoho to take his bullshit half-assed apology and shove it. We were standing up and clapping. She just reminded everyone why the right and some of the Democratic Party are so afraid of her. 

Note five: There are so many just terrible Republican senators. Tom Cotton probably drinks human blood because he likes the taste. Mitch McConnell drowns puppies for kicks. Lindsey Graham has all but disappeared up Trump's ass. But we'll be damned if Ron Johnson isn't gunning for the top spot. Not only is this fucking traitor using the Senate to launder Kremlin attacks on Biden after spending a Fourth of July in Moscow, but he's also the douchebag who just blocked Juneteenth from becoming a federal holiday. It's almost like he hates this country and is working with a different country to destroy this one. Almost. Right?

Note six: Need a laugh this morning? Kaleigh McAsomething told Fox that Trump wished Ghislaine Maxwell well because "the last person who was charged in this case ended up dead in a jail cell," and Trump really wants justice to happen in a court of law. Our hats off to anyone dumb enough to believe that shit. We're not even gonna make fun of them. Life must be pretty hard if you go around believing idiotic garbage like that. 

Note seven: 50 tweets from the president of the United States this morning. Not one of them about the 143,000 Americans who have died from a mismanaged pandemic on his watch.

Note eight: Chuck Todd. Boy, we don't know. 

Note nine: This guy sucks so hard. More: CNN

Note 10: It's almost weekend time! Y'all hanging in there? We keep saying it, but we really don't know how you do it. You smell fantastic. Like candy and kicking ass. Have a fabulous day, and try not to get any Trump shit on ya.

Portland strong

Yesterday, Trump and his top henchman, congressional free pass holder Bill Barr, announced their plans to send more of their stormtroopers into American cities where they are not wanted. After Trump spent the afternoon lying about the situation on the ground and boasting that he will invade these cities with "great force," the mayor of Portland along with lots of other brave Americans were tear-gassed by federal troops. The mayor said he saw zero provocation. This comes after Barr straight up lied to the American people by saying there had already been 200 arrests in Kansas City (there was one!). But this morning Trump did what he does best and made an already shitty situation exponentially worse. First, he attacked former DHS Secretary Tom Ridge, boasting that he loves "watching pathetic Never Trumpers squirm!" And then he retweeted a Proud Boys fan boy who pretends to be a journalist and was questioning the gender identity of the moms who showed up to protect protesters. Moms like that kind of thing, right? Don't expect any of these things to dominate news coverage because Joe Biden made a gaffe about history. And that's totally just as bad. Be sure to read about Philly DA Larry Krasner who is actually standing up for his people. More: The Daily Beast, NBC News,, Bloomberg, CNN, Politico

This is bad

The U.S. had more than 1,000 deaths for the second day in a row, and that ain't happened for a while. Trump's pandemic failures are multiplying, and the American people are paying the price. We now have more than 143,000 deaths total, 4 million cases (we're number one!) and another 1.4 million filed for unemployment claims last week. But the good news is that Republicans aren't doing a fucking thing about any of this, letting the UI benefits lapse and proposing to replace them with chump change. Oh and the moratorium on evictions expires Friday, which is horrifying news for millions. Meanwhile, Trump blamed the bad numbers on protesters and Mexico because blaming Black people, progressives and Mexicans is just what he does. This is what broken, failed government looks like. And the lack of corresponding news coverage is what broken, failed news media looks like. More: USA Today

School daze

Trump still has zero plan for getting our kids back to school safely, and more school systems are going to online only for the fall because of it. As he continues to push unsafe conditions on our kids and teachers, he's also lying about how safe it is. Both he and Betsy DeVos have been pushing the idea that kids are just fine with COVID with DeVos going as far as to say that children are "stoppers" of the virus. These are some sick, sick fucking people. Did you see Sen. Rick Scott say the other day that kids should go back to school but his grandkids won't be going? Polling makes clear that the American people aren't down with this dangerous shit. But again we ask, why the hell would we re-elect a president who is this cavalier with the lives and safety of our children? And why the fuck are so bad at messaging that? More: Associated Press, CNN, Washington Post, The Daily Beast

Today's clips

The Trump administration is detaining immigrant children as young as 1 in hotels, sometimes for weeks, before deporting them to their home countries under policies that have effectively shut down the nation's asylum system during the coronavirus pandemic, according to documents obtained by The Associated Press.
More: Associated Press

The first confirmed coronavirus outbreak at an Iowa meatpacking plant was far more severe than previously known, with more than twice as many workers becoming infected than the state Department of Public Health told the public, newly released records show.
More: Associated Press

The White House is conducting contact tracing after a cafeteria worker tested positive for coronavirus, three Trump administration officials tell NBC News.
More: NBC News

One day after President Donald Trump's campaign released a TV ad attacking presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden as a socialist sympathizer, Democrats hit back, noting the ad — which focused on calls to boycott Goya Foods and pulled at Cuban American heartstrings with images of the exile experience — is narrated by a Cuban actress who once recited a poem dedicated to infamous communist revolutionary Che Guevara.
More: Miami Herald

Sen. Kelly Loeffler (R-Ga.), who co-owns the Atlanta Dream franchise, said she fears that the WNBA's public support for the Black Lives Matter movement could drive some fans away.
More: ESPN

Abbott's net approval rating for his administration's COVID-19 response has slipped by 21 points since early June, when 56% of voters approved of his response and 36% disapproved.
More: Axios

Joe Biden's presidential campaign on Wednesday deployed a new tactic to reach voters when bunting-strewn stages and boisterous rallies have been set aside: using cinematic flourish to tease a major appearance with Barack Obama intended to excite Democrats and troll President Trump with the presence of his popular predecessor.
More: Washington Post

Sen. Patrick Leahy (D-Vt.) introduced a bill with the support of 47 co-sponsors on Wednesday that would fully restore the landmark Voting Rights Act of 1965 in the name of the late civil rights icon Rep. John Lewis (D-Ga.).
More: Axios

Tensions among congressional Republicans fueled by the party's diminishing electoral fortunes broke out into the open this week — as GOP lawmakers sparred over the shape of the next coronavirus aid package, how vigorously to stand behind President Trump and which primaries to wade into that could help determine control of the Senate in November.
More: Washington Post

The House voted Wednesday to remove statues of Confederate leaders from the Capitol and replace the bust of Roger B. Taney, the U.S. chief justice who wrote the Supreme Court decision that said people of African descent are not U.S. citizens.
More: Washington Post

President Trump's relentless efforts to sow doubts about the legitimacy of this year's election are forcing both parties to reckon with the possibility that he may dispute the result in November if he loses — leading to an unprecedented test of American democracy.
More: Washington Post

The Trump administration announced this week the nomination of a former conservative commentator with a history of inflammatory and conspiratorial tweets to be the head of the Office of Personnel Management.
More: CNN




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